Life & Death Joy & Sadness

So ive been banging away at this 'business' for some 4 years now, i got the studio in the September and then my died died so i was thrown off kilter for a while and just functioned till the piercing part of grief left my body. Anway the past month my uncle has been dying and rather than him go to a hospice, my sister chose to have him at her house & palliative care for him. Like round robins we have all been popping by to share his end of life with him and seeing that he is comfortable and as pain free as possible. To look death in the face again as i did with my dad is most harrowing and i find its aura kind of sticks to my clothes . My uncle is now going through moments of clarity to sitting forward with a look of sheer horror, like the Scream painting by Expressionist artist Edvard Munch ..gasping , mouth wide open with eyes like golf balls ,like he really has seen a ghost. The second to last time i went he stroked my face like a blind man feeling for recognition. The last time i saw him, was it yesterday? or the day before.. he looked at me and said " i know you" and gave me a smile-i made him smile again by doing something 'silly' - he has the best sense of humour..so i stroked his arm and forehead gave him a drink as he was thirsty and a kiss and said nanight. Today i have had a message on my phone if i want to go over as he will die today , but i choose not to.

RIP Uncle

Now to take care of my mother

This is only 'my' experience .

Everyone has their own.